Most times, I know more about what’s behind me than what’s in front of me. Past experience tends to inform me about what worked and what didn’t, what I’m in control of and all the things that are out of my control, and since the past is already written, there is little anxiety about it. What’s in front of me, however, is a lot of uncertainty, which makes it really hard to make decisions. The saying that “people make the best decision they can at that time” leaves me wondering why I lacked so much information that the consequences of my choices are not what I wanted. Hindsight being 20/20 and all that.
I like the 2026 calendar I have. It’s not one I’ve had before. It has the months and the weeks, and it also has little extras that I’m finding I’ll use. I have a list in my 2025 calendar of all the regular “happenings” (expenses, birthdays, hobby group meetings, etc.). I use colored pens to brighten the calendar and draw my attention to particular tasks that I can control. Paying Holly’s board. Super savings day at the grocery store. When to write my blog and newsletter. Regular clients. Despite my list of what to jot down on particular days, it leaves a whole lot of “white space”. Space where I have lots of uncertainty about what might happen.
When I write and publish a book, I’m not in control of who sees it, how many people might buy it, or any reviews readers might leave. Whether a book does well or not is still something I have thoughts about and probably always will, because I care that the titles I publish are the best I can make them. It’s only in hindsight that I know if my decisions were “successful” or not. But there are some decisions that need to be made that can have drastic consequences. I won’t know if I made the right choice until time has passed. Maybe it’s not always about making an informed decision. Maybe sometimes it’s about what will be easiest, what will relieve the current level of worry and concern, which choice will have the least devastating affect if something out of my control occurs. I can always edit a book to make it better. I can’t always edit a decision.
In chatting with a writing friend today, she reminded me that doing this author thing means I’m in control of how I spend my time and where I put my energy. When I shared with her what I planned to do in 2026, she said it sounded like I was going to do what I enjoyed doing, what I felt inspired to do in that particular month. When I look to the past 17 years of writing books, I see the choices I made based on what I can control, what I gambled with, and the outcomes. Sometimes the stakes are too high to risk on a gamble. Though I can’t see what will happen in 2026, I can make choices that may help navigate those unknown consequences.
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